10 Best Ways To Break Up With Your Girlfriend

Are you looking for the kindest way to break up with someone? In this post, we’ve answered your question on how do I break up with my girlfriend without hurting her.

The need for break up in a relationship is something that could happen to you at some point in life, but do we really know how to end a relationship? Or better yet, is it possible to move forward without hurting the other person?

Closing a stage that once meant so much to us is undoubtedly a difficult time. When we finish a chapter we find ourselves between uncertainty about the new future and nostalgia for what we are leaving behind. And although finishing stages is a natural part of life, we are not necessarily prepared to face what this situation implies.

The big question that appears in break up is; First, is there any way to break up with a loved one without hurting?

Experts in couple psychology point out that the term relationship is an intimately personal experience. Despite having two parties involved, it is not possible for both to experience the breakup in the same way.

Personality traits, unresolved childhood problems, and personal resources significantly influence the time of facing the breakup

Therefore, the first thing you should know is that you can’t have control over your girlfriend’s experience at the time of finishing.

However, experts also point out that appropriate words and acts are key to breaking up in a relationship without hurting yourself and your girlfriend.

Going down this article is 10 best ways to break up with your girlfriend

But first, what do people experience during the breakup?

When a couple breaks up, They start with a grieving process. This is a stage where the person learns to adapt to a new life without us.

But this is not always a logical process, since it can touch very deep unresolved wounds of the past and trigger negative beliefs about themselves. Therefore, it is a deeply emotional and hard process for most people.

However, this information is not to make you give up your idea of breaking up, but to make you aware of why the way you break up in a relationship is so important and motivate you to act with affective responsibility during this process.

1. Rank your ideas and clarify your reasons why you want to break up

The first step is to understand what are the reasons that motivate you to call it an end.

At the time of this breakup, it is very likely that your partner has questions and it is ideal that you have the necessary answers.

Being aware of why you are breaking up with her will help you deliver a clear message, and will make her grief have fewer uncertainties or unresolved questions. This is essential to move forward.

2. Don’t wait for the perfect moment

If you have already made the decision, do not wait for the perfect conditions to take the step because there is always never a perfect moment.

Above all, if you feel exhausted or disillusioned with the relationship, this can be perceived by your partner through reactions or unconscious attitudes on your part. You could unintentionally be hostile or indifferent, and consequently, you could do more harm to it instead of protecting it.

3. The environment matters;

It is important to know that breaking up with someone is not something you can do lightly. It should not feel like a procedure or a banal conversation.

Look for a private space, if you do it in public it is likely that she will not feel confident to express herself. Do it in a space where both feel comfortable and can take the time to talk and even be vulnerable to feeling necessary.

4. Be sincere, but not cruel

Honesty doesn’t mean being hard. Keep in mind that she will find herself in a state of great vulnerability. Everything you say at that moment will remain in her memory and every time she remembers it, it could reopen new wounds.

Therefore, be kind. Be very aware of your words. Self-a-questioner: What is the benefit of saying this? If you do not find anything constructive, or if you believe that that information can potentially harm her more, it is better to avoid it.

5. First of all, be empathetic

It’s hard to break up, but it’s even harder to break up when you’re still in love. Therefore, even if you have good reasons to break up, try to put yourself in her shoes and show empathy. Use a tone of voice and words according to the situation. Indifference and sarcasm could be interpreted as a lack of interest in what she had. This could lead to a more painful breakup since the other could believe that her presence was never significant to you.

6. Be grateful

Being grateful to others is the best way to make her feel valued and recognized.

Although probably in recent times the relationship was not the best, there is always a good side to every bond.

Maybe she taught you something about yourself, you knew your own limits, what you like or what you don’t like, or you grew up on a personal level. It is important to recognize what that impact was on your life, let her know, and show her your gratitude for that growth.

This will make you feel that the relationship was not in vain and had a meaningful sense and purpose in your life.

7.  Get ready to listen

Part of empathy is also opening up to listening to what the other has to say. As we have pointed out, it is difficult to predict the reaction of the other. You could be indifferent, have any questions or take advantage of the moment to make catharsis and express everything you feel necessary.

Experts in mourning say that those who go through this process, often find it difficult to move forward because they feel that they could not say or express everything they wanted at the time.

Therefore, being open to listening could make it easier to make your recovery process more bearable. Likewise, it is important not to allow comments or aggressive behaviors knowing how to set limits and redirect the conversation from a constructive approach.

8. Do not leave endings open

When you are not sufficiently emphatic or clear that the term is definitive, you are subtracting from the other the possibility of making a closure.

Being ambiguous will deliver false hopes that only generate confusion and resistance to move forward, which will end up prolonging the grieving process further.

9. Assume your responsibility and avoid punishing

In a couple, both parties are responsible for the problems of the relationship. Avoid holding your partner responsible for the end of the relationship or making her feel that things would have worked if she had acted differently.

The truth is that if the relationship did not prosper it is due to the intention of both parties. Therefore, do not punish or deposit responsibility entirely on the other, this will only cause an unnecessary burden and a recovery process hindered by guilt.

10. Take some time before being friends

Separating from someone and becoming friends is a process. It is advisable not to skip stages and take the time to live each cycle accordingly.

Taking distance is probably the most difficult step, but it is a necessary and most important transit so that the person can get used to his new life. Maintaining the same level of contact only generates more confusion and does not give enough space to close the stage.

Research on couple separations concludes that the probability of transforming the bond and moving to a friendship is much more feasible when both parties have lived and learned from their personal grief. That is the only way to move towards a true friendship since resentments or blockades have already been worked on, and so they can evolve into a new type of bond.