120 Best Dad Jokes That Are Hilarious

Have you never had a fantastic evening out with your dad? Or have you been to the beach together? If yes, you will know that daddies are not just good at teaching you how to fix a worn-out car tire, how to be a real man, how to be a daddy’s girl, or the best possible ways to protect your sisters.

We’ve put together the funniest dad jokes for everyone who has a great sense of humor and can put laughter on everyone’s face in the family. I know that by now, you’re already wondering about these jokes and what they sound like. In this article, we’ll be looking at the 100 best dad jokes that are actually funny. I know you can’t wait already; let’s dive in and have a good time.

Best Dad Jokes That Are Actually Funny

1.   Singing your favorite song in the shower is such a fun experience until soap gets into your mouth. Boom! It’s a soap opera.

2.  If we say April showers come with May flowers, what do we say of May Flower?

3.   Hey! Mr Mathematics, it’s high time you grow up and stop bothering us with solving your own problems.

4.   Do you know that fruits lack business sense? If not,  why do they have seasons?

5.   When you meet somebody with nobody and a nose, he has a name. Nobody knows!

6.   When you want to make a 7 even,  you take the S.

7.   I’ve got so many jokes to tell about chemistry but I feel it won’t get a reaction.

8.  Ever heard about chocolate record players? Guess  what? It sounds so sweet!

9.  Walked into a mall to pick 6 cans of sprite only to get home and realized I picked 7 up.

10.  I asked my cat what three plus three is.  He answered nothing.

11.  What was baby corn’s response to mama corn? Where is pop corn?

12.   I don’t know the best things about Switzerland but I know the flag is a huge plus.

13.   Can you remember where you learned how to split a banana? Quite easy. At Sundae school!

14.  Hey! What contains more letters than Alpha? It’s the post office!

 15.  Guess what you can call a poor Santa Claus? Nickel-less.

16.  I lost my trust in trees because they are shady.

17.  My spouse is damn mad at me. What’s my offense? She said I’ve lost my sense of direction.

 18.  Act like a nut, and you’ve got the squirrel’s love.

19.   Do you know why eggs don’t tell jokes? They’d crack each other up.

20.   Bicycles can’t stand for themselves because they have TWO TIRED.

21.  Initially had planned on going on an expensive vacation with a classical keyboardist. However,  he was too extravagant.

22.   If you think swimming with sharks is cheap, you must be kidding because that costs an arm and a leg.

23.   I can try out Algebra and essential calculus, but geometry is never.

 24.  Two guys stepped into a pub, and the third guy ducked.

25.   How do you get the native girl’s attention? A tractor!

26.   Sundays are usually a bit of a sad day, but the day after is dismal.

 27.  Dogs can’t handle MRI machines, but Catscan

28.  During exams,  I failed calculus exams because I was positioned in the middle of identical twins. It was difficult to differentiate between them.

29.  What do the royals’ pancakes contain? SIR UP!

30.  Each time I want to eat a healthy meal, a chocolate bar keeps looking at me.

31.  If you witness a crime scene at the Apple store, it makes you an iWitness.

32.   I was once fired from working at a juice company. Evidently because I couldn’t concentrate.

 33. My child is blaming me for wrecking his birthday. I forgot it was his birthday.

 34.  My boss inquired why I usually feel sick on workdays and I answered it’s my weekend immune system.

35.  I attempted buying a smart last week but before I knew it they sold it. I guess I’m not smart.

36.  I was asked to add ketchup to the grocery list. Surprisingly, I can’t find it anymore!

37.   Guess what snakes enjoy studying in school? It’s no different from HISSSS-TORY!

38.   To tell which bunnies are the oldest in a group, search for the one with gray hares.

39.  Guess what you derive from mixing Christmas with an apple computer? You get a pine-apple.

40.  What would you love to call a fish that has no eyes? I will call it FSH.

41.  What would you prefer to call a cow with two legs? Lean beef is great.

42.  What’s the name given to a dude having a rug on his head? Matt!

43.   Do you know that pop music scares balloons?

44.  What do you name a group of bunnies moving rearward in a row? A hareline is moving away.

45.  Santa Claus works at the North Pole for what reason? Because the penguins expelled him from the South Pole.

46.  Why did the veg make the plumber call? A scallion was there.

47.   What makes spiders so clever? Because on the internet, they can find anything.

48.  What are the similarities between teddies and turkeys? All of them are stuffed.

49.   What do dogs and phones share in common? Each has a collar ID. Not hard, right?

50.  Why do they avoid playing the game of poker in the forest? A surplus of cheetahs.

51.  What is leather and has a sneeze-like sound? A shoe.

52.  How can a bull be stopped from charging? Your credit card is canceled.

53. What made the math book depressing? There were far too many issues.

54.   Why are fish so intelligent? since swimming is taught in schools.

55. The worker was let go from the keyboard manufacturing for what reason? He wasn’t working nearly enough hours. Such a lazy ass worker!

56.  How does a scientist make herself smell better? Using expert-mints!

57.   When a gang of apes establishes a business, how do you brand it? Crazy venture!

58.   I just can’t put my anti-gravity textbook down. I’m engrossed in reading it right now.

59.  Why do some partners visit the gym house together? They want their connection to thrive for these reasons.

60.  Which turkey’s side has the most feathers? The exterior!

Related: 100+ Funny Jokes To Tell Your Friends

61.   I advised your mother that her eyebrows were drawn too high. She appeared startled.

62.  Have you heard the story of the man who amputated his left leg? He is presently ok.

63.   I guess you’ve heard about the astronaut with claustrophobia? He only required a small amount of room.

64.  Which genres of music are appropriate to listen to while fishing? Something appealing!

65.   A girl standing on a tennis court would be called what? Annette.

66.   What message did the sea have for the beach? Hardly anything. It simply waved.

 67.  What was said between the walls? You can find me in the corner.

68.   The nose feels because it’s the constant target of all external abuse.

69.  What do the Eiffel Tower and a tick have in common? They are both in Paris.

70.  What’s the name of a fish sporting a bowtie? Sophisticated!

71.  In the snow, how do you follow Will Smith? You sure go after the current footprints.

72.  I usually think my clothes were shrinking in the dryer, but it turns out the refrigerator was the issue along

73.   I worry so much about the calendar. Because time is running out.

74.  My wife instructed me to practice thrusts to maintain my fitness. I guess that would be a significant improvement.

75. Why do dads bring a second pair of socks when golfing? If they make a hole-in-one

76.  I only remember 24 of the alphabet’s letters. I have no idea y.

77.   How is the comet’s haircut? Eclipse it

78.   What was said between the two walls? I’ll see you at the corner, she said.

79.  What was the eight told by the zero? “That belt suits you well.”

80.  A skeleton enters a tavern and calls out, Hey, bartender. I’ll have a mop and one beer.

81.  Guess what a baby computer calls his daddy? data!

82.  Brrroom brrrooom brrooom goes the vehicle sound of a witch’s vehicle.

83.  Can January march? Obviously no, but April May.

84.  Do moths swim? Yes! Using the butterfly stroke!

 85. The best watch to see a fly fishing competition is a live stream.

86.  A joke about pizza would have been funny but cheesy.

87.   Why do melons get wedded? since they are cantaloupes.

88.   I’ll sleep until there are pancakes if the early bird gets the worm.

89.   Even the cake had tiers since the wedding was so exquisite. Quite amazing!

90.   Guess the magician’s response to the fisherman? Choose any code you like.

91.   Celebrities do not get hot because they have many fans.

 92.  When you want to organize a space party, your planet!

93.  Are you aware that milk has the fastest evaporation rate on the planet? It’s that fast! Before you see it, it is pasteurized!

94.   How early did the man arrive for the dentist’s check? Tooth late!

 95.  The most condescending bear is pan-duh!

 96.  Guess what the police officer said to his belly button?  You’ll remain under a vest!

97.  The reason the bees have sticky hairs is that they make use of honeycomb.

98. When the beautiful bride walked down the aisle, the flowers rose.

99.  Why was green a famously lonesome color? It was constantly cynical.

100.  I used to detest facial hair, but then, it grew all over my face. So, I’ve got no choice!

101.   Daddy, can you put on my snickers? Not  at all,  it’s not my size.

102.   Why is it that a nose can’t be 12 inches in length? Because it would then be a foot.

103.  When a lemon takes up the answers to a phone call, what does it say? Yellow!

104.  This graveyard appears to be overcrowded. It must be a popular tourist attraction in the land if the dead. Who knows?

105.   What sort of automobile does an egg drive? A yolkswagen!

106.  Dad, I just noticed the cat is on fire. Can you put the fire out?

107.  Two plates were set on the dining table, and one said to the other, dinner is on me!

108.  What’re 90 degrees and ice-covered? The poles, both north, and south.

109.   What took place when the red ship and the blue ship came together at sea? They are isolated from their crews.

110.   Saturdays and Sundays are the most important days of the week. The other days are just for work.

111.   Guess what distinguishes the swine flu from the bird flu is that one buzzes for a shout and the other for an oink.

112. The golfer bought two pairs of jeans, but why? in the event he hit a hole-in-one.

113.   How can a bull possibly be stopped from charging? Stop using its credit card.

114. How does Will Smith follow you in The Mud? Follow the current footprints.

115   Hey, boiling water, RIP to you.  you will be missed.

116.   Guess what a sprinter ate before the race? Absolutely nothing. They fast!

117.   One toilet said to the other, do you know how you look? You look flushed!

 118.   The leopard hides because he’s often spotted.

119.   Guess what an illegally parked frog is called? A toed!

120. How does a cow do his mathemathematics? It uses a cow-culator

Conclusion

Having your dad around will always lighten up the moment. With so many hilarious jokes, he will keep the environment lively. The 100 best dad jokes, which are hilarious and are detailed above, will not only make you laugh out loud but will also help lighten up your mood. Feel free to share them with your dad or any other father figure in your life.