Although sexless marriage can be healthy, there are many people who argue how healthy and sustainable it could be in the long run.
Any marriage without sex is unhealthy, and not everyone can put up with it. We also understand that most marriages undergo a dry period for some duration of time. However, it can be caused by many things which include work-related stress, money issues, unemployment, etc.
However, is going without sex for those still legally married and living together healthy? The answer is no. Don’t forget that there is a great difference between irregular dry moments and a sexless marriage; as many marriage counselors would say, sex is an essential component of a good and happy marriage that should be taken seriously. What a sexless marriage does to a man or what a sexless marriage does to a woman, is mostly negative.
Now, let’s look at when to walk out of a sexless marriage. What warning signs should you be on the lookout for? So, if this looks like what you’re seeking, dive in deeper!
Understand what a sexless marriage is in detail
A sexless marriage can be explained as a situation whereby a couple is not sexually intimate with the other partner. This could be due to some reasons best known to the couple or sometimes due to a lack of feeling for each other.
Also, when one partner lacks the craving for intimacy with the other, there is an underlying problem in the relationship.
However, a sexless marriage can also be due to an unresolved misunderstanding that has metamorphosed into a serious issue in marriage. Now, keep in mind that not having sex with your spouse for a short period is not a sexless marriage and can happen once in a while.
What are the signs that can result in a sexless marriage?
There are a couple of things that can result in a sexless marriage, and we’ll list them below. If you find any of these challenges in your marriage, then it’s time to work on your marriage.
- Potency issues
- Reduced or low self-confidence
- Conflict and connection problems
- Aging or decline in sexual desires
- Objections and a lack of backing
- Early trauma
- Heightened expectations and pressure
- Different or subpar sex urges
- Pregnancies or childbirth
- Low sex drive
The signs to know when to walk away
The dangers of a sexless marriage can be seen in the percentage of sexless marriages that end in divorce. When there’s no intimacy in marriage between husband and wife, the marriage and love seem to die quicker.
Certain signs should tell you when to leave a sexless marriage or relationship. No one deserves to be tortured emotionally, and we’ll be discussing some of those signs below;
When therapy couldn’t help, then, it’s time to walk out
You can decide to walk away from your marriage in a situation where your partner has given therapy a chance to fix your sex life. Yet, sexual intimacy is still an unresolved issue. This signifies that your marital sexual challenges cannot be solved, and happiness can’t be revived.
Here, the best thing to do is to walk away from the marriage to avoid getting emotionally damaged. Having a separate bedroom can also result in this. It is also impossible to rule out the probability of sexless relationship sadness and depression in the circumstances like this.
Also, these are a few risks associated with a sexless union, and It is advised that you move on quickly to safeguard your mental health. You are not guilty if you demand a divorce at this point.
Using sex withdrawal to exercise control over your spouse
It’s time to walk away from your marriage once you notice your partner uses sex withdrawal to exert control over you. A lot of couples do this, and it isn’t good. A sexless marriage can be used to manipulate or put pressure on one of the partners, which is one of its risks.
Sex is often used as a tool of control in unhealthy relationships. Serious and significant problems may plague your relationship if you or your partner utilize sexual connections to exert control over each other.
If one withholds sexual intimacy as a kind of discipline and then engages in sexual intimacy to reward the other for desired conduct, it’s time to walk away.
When your marriage is experiencing other relationship challenges
The absence of sex in a marriage is often the outward sign of underlying emotional challenges. If your partner finds it difficult and uncomfortable to be Intimate with you, there may be a deeper problem at play that you fail to notice.
However, if your spouse cannot show affection and emotions physically, it’s because of these problems. Make use of this time to find out if you’re suffering from sexless marriage alone or if you’re unhappy in the marriage as well.
Address your marital issues first before talking about intimacy. However, if there seems to be no solution, it’s time to walk away.
When infidelity becomes the order of the day
Even though it is heartbreaking and filled with feelings of disappointment, infidelity does sometimes occur in some marriages.
However, certain couples can overcome it and work things out in their marriages. But the situation changes when cheating becomes a chronic occurrence.
Also, when it deteriorates to the point where neither partner speaks of it, neither is trying to hide it anymore because both partners are aware that the other person Is cheating. Then, it’s another clear indication that you should end your marriage.
There is no more affection between you and your partner
You should walk away from your marriage if there is no longer affection and love between you and your spouse. If the both of you are drifting apart, the marriage now lacks intimacy and is unsatisfying; you should get a divorce.
When your spouse is not ready to seek external help
One of the best pieces of advice or professional guidance on sexless marriage you should go for is seeking external help and therapy. There is little possibility that you two will be able to fix the sexless problem if your partner is unwilling to take a step.
You have no alternative but to end your marriage if your relationship is suffering due to a lack of sex and your partner is unwilling to seek external support or get healthy counseling that can keep your sex life going.
Furthermore, when one spouse refuses assistance when it is necessary, the other spouse may be emotionally damaged. Then it’s time to get a divorce or separation.
Finally, ensure that you talk things out with your partner if you’re no longer happy with how things are going in your marriage as regards your intimacy. You can search for ways to rekindle your sexual drive and build bonds, from understanding why it occurred to trying open marriage and experimenting with other intimate activities. But after all, if this persists, then it’s time to walk away.